first nite so far

it is currently 9:47 pm. yosef is still awake. i hear him but it sounds like he is actually in his room [not sure if in bed but def. his room]. yosef anbd chavi were put to bed at 7. he and chavi closed the door and we didnt hear from them for a while. adam went up to check on them. they had trashed the room. he put them to bed and chavi was asleep by 745. yos has been running around singing for the past 2 hours. he came down at around 8:30 and i put him back upsatirs thinking that would be the end. but i still heard him so i went up and he had turned on the lights and was reading. but since then he has been at the top of my stairs singing every song he knows. chanukah songs, ani maamin and the wheels on the bus were some that i could make out. ill post tomorrow what time he actually went down. i tihnk soon as i have not heard him since i finished the first few lines. [it could just be he is playing]

Ta slept for 8 hours on the plane.

Chaim locked me in the basement

It is not easy being a single parent

Its tough having to balance school work with the children. Tonight i had to take away mikeys phone because he was texting instead of doing his school work. He screamed at me saying I have to do my school work instead of blogging. If he only knew the trials and tribulations I have to go through for my kinder (what is the singular of kinder).

Last nights post (since I was so busy I didnt have time to do it): I went to my friends wedding (their were more HASC sweatshirts there then suits) and I came a little late so I grapped my seating card and ran into the chuppah (pronunciation: CHOO - PA) and asked around (whispering) to see who was at my table. Everyone was at 49 and I was at 44. I was a little concerned but, IM CHAIM G NOTHING CAN STOP ME, so i proceed to my table with my head held up high and booming with self confidence. Baruch Hashem because I was the only boy at the table (maybe more girls then the library). I double checked the card and thank G-d I did, because I was about to sit in Ms. Chani Gross's seat. oops

big boy bed

i realized that i have not posted in a while, i have commented but not posted. i guess nothing exciting has happend. but have no fear there is an end in sight. i recieved a call a few hours ago from sleeptight bedding. they will be delivering yosef's bed tomorrow. i wonder how tomorrow night will go....

A poopy poem

I walked off the elevator and I gasped, what a shock,

The smell was so bad, worse then a smelly sock.

there was a river floating through the middle of the hall,

and right on top was a little doody ball.

I turned to the security guard and asked what was wrong,

He said the pipe was over flowing and "that all is dong".

Then with a second glance i started to shriek,

I realized from my room it did leak.

Baruch Hashem none of my stuff got too ruined,

Or else to YU i would have been sue-in.

Its now time to sleep and nothing else is doing

But the Rayach Nichoach really is quite soothing.

Wow!

Tzipora Pallock thinks my Chaim jokes are funny. Enough said.......

I guess I could go into the family busines

My midterm today was deadly. I gave it 110% so I guess there is nothing i can complain about. But I was thinking, why am I trying so hard, Why dont I just go in to the family business. There are a lot of tough question I have to ask myself though. Toras Moshe (ToMo) or YGFT (Yeshiva Gedolah of the Five towns. Should I go for the chashov melech route or the humble cool talmif chacham route. Either way, father in laws dont grow on trees so it is back to the library for me.

PS - Isnt it funny either way I have to be in the library (either working on the Father in Law or my classes)

Rochel leah is the shabbos ema

i hope she doesnt eat allk the snacks i put into her tik

Wow! haven't blogged in a while....ACHAH!!!

Me: Rabbi Fogol i think you hate me

R.F. (Rabbi Fogol) Mikey what are you talking about?!

Me: well you gave me a 60 for class participation on Sunday

R.F. we didn't even have school sunday!!!!

Me: ACHAH!!!!!!!!

the name of the one was Shiphrah, and the name of the other Puah;

Im concerned. I was speaking to a friend of mine with older parents (he is 20 and his mom will be 60) and he told me his mom picked up a new profession. A LIBRARIAN (Ahhhhhhhhh). I can just see mommy saying "what a good idea". Can our mother become the old woman, chain around her reading glasses, shushing 6 month old babies? So i raised my concerns to mommy and she said "I dont think it is for me, but what about a midwife". I guess being mindy's labor coach wasn't enough, she wants a more active role. I cant wait to introduce my future wife to mommy, and explaining she is a midwife.

When I told my friend he responded "Oh my G-d, your going to have so many half brothers". Tzarich Iyun (requires explanation for those of you not yeshivishly inclined.

Visitng Day

Were starting to perepare ma and tas arrival here in the Jacobowitz home. You know the "erev" visiting day feeling? Squeezing out the toothpaste, washing the bath mat, cleaning out the fridge. We did a lot of preperating tonight. (and for those of you asking arent I sick, Mc told me that Im only allowed to be sick for 24 hrs. and my time was up. ) Right now he looks like he jst got of the plane (vehamavin yavin)
Bassie J

Bubby Zeidie Coming

I'm so sick. I think I caught Riki's stomach virus. I was so sick last night and today (MC didnt even go to shul, a first in the jacobowitz home.) RL kept on saying today (w/o prompting) Bubby Zeide coming and then stats jumping up and down. OK , im going back to bed. Gut voch, bassie j

what???

i understood that the rapps family joined the blog. that was inevitable. but now elie? i dont mind im just saying....

ACHAH

Another Dialogue (sometimes you need to post twice in one night)

YU Security: Can i see your ID please?

Chaim G: Are you new here?

YU Security: No

Chaim G: Come on your new here?

YU Security: No, I have been here since 1996.

Chaim G: I have never seen you before.

YU Security: I have seen you before

CHaim G: ACHAH!

And he let me proceed without any more questions (video compliments of Srulii)

Things i wish i could have said today

Girl: can you please be quiet

Chaim: If you want the 4th floor there is no talking so you might be able to study better

Girl: I tried but there are no eats up there

Chaim: how about stern, Im sure there are plenty of seats there.

Next Maysah, in the elevator.

Girl #1: Did you have any finals today?

Girl #2: Yeah my Kashrus final.

Chaim G: Clearly you failed your tznius final (we are still accepting donations to the Gimach).

Is it weird that i feel the need to shave before i go to studying? I think the reason the shiduch crisis exists in the more yeshivish velt (Why is it the Yeshivish Velt vs. The modern orthodox world, why cant we in YU be a velt) is because they dont study in the YU library. There is no age gap here. Any XY will talk to any XX (I'm referring to the male and female chromosomes to show how much i have learnt in college).

PS - Im having trouble with my essay does MC have any open slots in the writing center?

Exciting times in the library

Today was an exciting day in my life. I met Ben Kendal (the star of the movie). I did not really meet him but i walked past him and tried to take a picture with the camera on my phone. There was a couple by the table next to him and they thought i was trying to take a picture of them. Bad Matzav. Someone called me up today asking if i was dating. I responded that I have been studying in the library a lot, if you guys could only see what goes on in this library. Its Bechinas camp HASC (we even have girls davening Shemone Esrei in between the book shelves).

Got to go back to studying

Team Chaim Out

Job of the week

Every week the CDC (career development center) has a job of the week. Normally i dont read them but this week it was forwarded to me by Chaim Cohen (not as good as elie but still pretty solid). The job is

PERFUSIONISTS

Perfusionists assist surgeons performing open-heart and other cardiac surgeries. They set up and operate the heart-lung machine that keeps patients alive by pumping oxygenated blood throughout the body while the heart is being operated on. Anyone interested in this profession should have the ability to concentrate for long periods of time

After half a week of studying for finals I think I can conclude both Moshe Chaim and I have the same chance of going into this field.

"Is Ta planning on coming early?"

Those were MC's (shlit"a) words as he opened up the fridge and saw that there was nothing in it. I told him I was saving up for Ta and thene he responded "Is Ta planning on coming early." Don't wory were not completly starving yet (Im just liquidating the freezer.) OK, bs"h Hashem (and Ta) will provide.

I visted Bubby and Zaidy. Esther loves Zaidy, its really cute.

Hope everyines enjoying the snow.

Basya J

Chaim Days till Purim

I dont know if you know (that I know that you know) but Purim is kind of a big deal in Shaalvim. The mifarshim bring down that Yom Kippur is Yom Kippurim, a day like purim. Rav Hutner talks about all the kiddushah that encompasses the day. SO as a result there is a countdown to Purim with some strategic marks along the way. One of those marks was two days again when in gimatriah it was Yayin days to purim and to day is another one of those strategic marks, IT IS CHAIM DAYS TILL PURIM. So if anyone is in the heights please stop by my room for a Frabregen good time.

snow day

uncle mikey was champion of the year yesterday. he played in the snow for over an hour with sunshine and yos. here are some pic.

Whats before surprise bart B?

Surprise part A. BH everyone had a really nice time despite the snow and we have plenty of pictures of the snow outside.

i sent e/o pictures, lkacod shabbos

Busy Week

Motzei Shabbos -Rbtzn. Katz
Sunday night - chazura shuir chanukah party
monday night - wechter party sponsered by the gross's
tues nigth- latzas bas mitzvah (roch threw up all over the fanciest ppl's car)
wednes day - reuits partys
thursday night - nervous break down and screamed at mc
friday night - cheskin and daniel + four boys

i would post my menu for shabbos (chaim, dotn worry, its chicken soup this shabbos) but i hardly started cooking. if i dont get a chance to post tom. whioch i probally wont b/c im cooking with my 2 helpers

have a great shabbos

Movie Idea: Lamed Vav, the hidden tzaddikim of Yeshiva University

Now that finals are coming and I am going to" swap notes" to get all my notes I am starting to wonder who writes all these notes. I am suggesting a movie idea to track them down. For example: Ben Kendel has 56 pages of beautiful notes on Modern Jewish history or Etan Berman 36 pieces of art on Bible. I have never met either of these men but if they only knew the difference they are making in my life. The movie is to track them down, to let them know the difference they are making in the lives of many Young Yidden in Yeshiva University and just as an overall thank you for all there work. If only this movie can be counted a one of my finals.

P.S. I went to show my friend the post and turned to the security guard and asked "are you a security guard?" he responded yes, i then proceeded to ask him if he can "guard" my powerade for me while im gone. With a big grin on his face he said sure. BH for YU security.

for your listening pleasure

chavi and yosef have been putting on chanukah concerts for me for weeks now. here is a tidbit for you to hear.

Mikey and I Hit the Big Apple

What a busy day -

8:50am Drove Mikey to minyan @ DRS - Davening, breakfast and Chanuka Shiur with Rebbe

10:30am Pick up

10:45am LIRR

11:32am - E Train to Union Square. Walked around for 2 hours. We really enjoyed the different booths offering

very unusual gift items. We actually picked up a toothbrush holder for Mikey's bathroom in EY". It's 5

toes and you squeeze your toothbrush between the toes. (I'll ask Mike to post a picture. It's worth a 1,000 words). (I guess we'll have to check for lint occassionally!)

From there we went to KD for lunch (Mike - hot poppers, Me - falafel) We were starving by then and we enjoyed our food immensely. Afterwards we went to an exhibit of artifacts of the Titanic. It was quite fascinating.

We took the 5:32 home and met Ta and Buby and Zaide Gross in KD (King David) and said good-bye. We really enjoyed our day. BTW, did I mention the cologne and 2 AE sweatshirts we bought?

Also, I meant to post a Grossa Yasher Koach to Mindy S. What a fabulous Chanukah party. And Adam - Great DT.

They really need to make the library all boys

I was studying on the fifth floor of the library and i needed a break so i decided to take a walk around the floor. I saw the back of a girls head and it looked awfully familiar. I froze. I panicked. I had no idea what to do. So to make a long story short I made Gavi Unger come up to the fifth floor and check (it wasnt her). Do you think she still reads the blog. Well if she does (I want my sweatshirt back) this can be awkward. I think what we can all learn from this is to not study because you dont know who you might think you bump into.

Needed to chill

Its now 12:49 am. my house is finally quiet. My past 2 partys were a hit.
Mc has chazara shiur tom. Im not sure that its coninceidental that after the 'trifels' his attendance increased by 300%

Got to go to sleep befpre Esther wakes up, Bas

(quick funny story, mc put up a mechitzvah from my living room to the kitchen. In order to exit my house you needed to go through the kitchen. So MC's night seder chavrusa needed to leave early so he left the living room and on his way out thanked me ect. and when he was in the middle of doing so MC screams from across the room ''Bas, who u shmoozing with in the kitchen? and the whole place starts cracking up..
gtg to sleep
bus

Its not so funny

I have an ear infection. I am not on bubble gum medicine. I did not cry. I was not pulling on my ear and my mother realized so she took me to the doctor. It is not Hashem giving me a sign about my maturity. If anyone else has funny lines please post them but i think they were all already said by my "friends".

BH

Bubby and Grandma are on their way home from the Hospital and BH everything is fine. They should be home with enough time to throw senior citizen center food in the oven for a delicious bubby sue Shabbos.

yummy snack

chavi and yos are sitting nicely coloring pictures [and apparently my cabinet doors, discovered that later] in my kitchen this morning. i overhear the following conversation:
c: are you eating flour yos?
y: no im eating sugars
i go over to the pantry and sure enough yos is shoving fistfuls of sugar into his mouth. one may think oh no a kid bouncing off the wall. but bh it was 830 so it was morah miriams problem not mine. on a side note this was not the first time an occurence like this has happened week. on tueday yos was eating baking soda. he was foaming at the mouth.

The mikvah

Today Lakovod chanukah i decided to go to the mikvah. Since this was an on the spot decision i did not bring my own towel but used one of the public towels (eww gross). But you think that the towels were at least washed and dried. Not always. By the mikvah next door to the Ohel i was able to take a rare peak into its inner workings on erev Rosh Hashanah. I looked in the back room where i saw the men putting the towels in the dryer with no washing machine in sight. I guess the recession hit them really bad. May we all be zocheh to use freshly DRIED towels by the mikvah. AMEN

motzai shobbos menu

bas asked me a million times what im making so here it is:
apple cider
garlic knots
tuna
latkes [w/ caviar ala schachar]
lasagna
mini mushroon onion quiches
mini blinies
2 salads [courtesy of ma]
sufganiyot [beverly is buying]
red velvet cupcakes
yodel cupcakes

Sweater Vest

I have another engagement party tonight (am i the only one of my friends not engaged (even friedmans engaged)). So i decided to get dressed up. Im wearing a croc shoes, black pants, an adam shirt, and a sweater vest (see above). I walked into morning seder and everyone had a comment. Cant a man just wear a sweater vest in peace. Is a sweater Vest that big of a deal (its the warmth of a sweater with the freedom of motion like nothing was there). I think NOT!

chanuka party

menu

garlic bead
orange soup
lasagne/spinach lasagne
salmon loaf x2
quiche
ceaser salad
veg salad with honey mustard dressing
cake+ice cream

the jacobwitzs would like to thank the gross's for co-sponsoring the wechter/pilochowsky chanuka party. your plaque will be mailed to you in the mail.
estehers crying gtg

American line working

mc is a gvaldika mispallel ( he was also davening for his life b/c he knew if it doesnt work,,,,,,,,were back!)

Bubby Sue, this ones for you

Roch was going through the laundry tonight. Next thing I know shes wearing multiple multicolored necklaces (that were bought by bubby sue). Cant elaborate, want to keep this blog 'G' rated. G'night. busta.

American line not working

Emergencies? Jokes? Or just need to shmooze? 011-972-2-581-3565

nows the test to see who really loves me

Nothing exciting happening in my life right now

Latza called yesterdy to invite us to a bas mitzvah. Were having the jacobowitz chanukah party monday night. No, I will not be serving cavier on my latkes. I'm still waiting for mc to tell me when his chazara shuirs chanukah part is. im sure hell give me plenty of notice in advance. Thaats it for now. I have to run and get roch from gan, im sure shell be in a great mood.
bas

I'm Sick

Today I went to rite aid (buy their stock because as long as im sick their stock will be skyrocketing). So far I have bought:

Tylenol PM (to help me sleep through the night

Nyquil (so i will have a good morning medicine) (you are not supposed

to mix nyquil and tylenol but i found that out the hard way

BH I'm still here today though)

Theraflu (multi-symptom cold relief, it also says it has warming relief

but i havent felt it yet)

Cold eeze (the large lady helping me in rite aid told me to buy lemon

and honey flavor because "that stuff is good for you when you

have a cold, you know it clears up all that stuff", i think she

just told me to buy that flavor because no one else was)

Ludens (same thing as coldeeze but they taste good so they probably

dont work as well)

Saline Nasal Spray (i leaned my hear back and squeezed the bottle as

hard as i can, then proceeded to caugh, gag, sneeze, drip and

just chloch for the next half an hour)

Thermometer (the type that goes in your mouth)

Advil (mommy told me to buy this)

Entemans cookies (for the neshama)

May I be zocheh to feeling better b'karov mamish

rumbles

after a long fustrating morning i finaly got rumbles one year old pic taken. to view them go to www.picturethiskids.com. go to recent photos and you will see a mispelled version of my name. click on it and you will see how freakin cute rumbles is.

I stepped in poo

Thank G-d i was wearing shoes

Personal Chef

Today for lunch i made pizza with: sauce (the fancy kind, because us Gross's are very fancy), cheese, we then made an equator thing down the middle, on Mommy's side: cut up broccoli, and veggie pepperoni (experiment #1), on the favorite child's side: half of it just sauce, on the other half: cheese, garlic powder, onion powder, crushed red pepper, Italian seasoning, pickles (experiment #2), and hearts of palm. (experiment #3) thats all for now, may hashem grant all your wishes, and listen to your tefillahs good bye............

What a shabbos!

V'hamvin Y'avin.

Sacks-a- tone '09

This shabbos I had the Zchus of spending shabbos with Rav Sacks shlita (aka The Rosh Yeshiva). We davened in his shul and got put up with random families in the community (Eitan Buchbinder and I shared a basement of an empty house and forgot the code but that story is for another time). Friday night The Rosh Yeshiva sat in the middle of the table and i happened to be sitting a one end and our shiur captain Rafi Abraham was sitting at the other. We were all enjoying our soup when Rafi turns to The Rosh Yeshiva and says "You know Chaim has a very creative name for the shabbaton" and the entire table (already cracking up) turns to look at me. I look back at Rafi with a straight face and respond "I'm not sure exactly what it is Rafi, by any chance do you remember" when everyone continued to lose it. I left him out there for a good minute until i was worried their was no blood left in the rest of his body being that his face was so red and I explained to Rav Sacks it was called the Rav Sacks-a-tone. On cue he turns to his wife and says "We have a leibidig bunch this year". I was just glad i was able to add something to the shabbos.

PS - In the Q&A session at the end i asked The Rosh Yeshiva about Shidduch Vision, he first wanted to know what was wrong with a phone and remarked "I guess it is great if all you care about is the externals"

Great shabbaton all around more highlights will follow

What Do Yeshiva Bachrim Do After MIshmar

Flash Back From Shaalvim Thursday Nights with me Pruss and Shteingart

Did anyone loose anything?

If you did, its probally in Esther P's mouth. B''H EP has really started to crawl this week. I have found many things in her mouth (the brown part of the onion, a peice of glass) the only thing that cant fit in her mouth is Rochel. Were having a busy shabbos.

menu-
tri clor gefilta
orange soup from the freezer
chicken
chulent
apple kugel
yerushalmi kugel
salad
yeshiva desert made from richs whips

have a great shabbos. i would say i love u all but i cant keep track whose following the blog.

busta

az

yosef for some reasons is obsessed with this little toy. he walks around all day with it. until last week it had no name. friday morning he wakes up and keeps asking for AZ. i have no clue what he is talking about. then he pulls out this toy from the toy box and says "heres az!". coincidential that we saw the rapps family the day before? i think not. chavi has a doll named baby tatty and now yosef has a mini lemon figure named az.

8 months

(read in Rabbi Feiners voice and picture the hand motions and beard stroking) And their I was walking around YU and I saw a sign with a picture of the eloscious Rabbi from The White Shul, Congergation Knesseth Israel of Far Rockaway and I became intrigued. I went and took another look and lo and behold he was giving a shiur tonight L'zecher nishmas Rotty (Eight months to the day). SO how could one go and pass up an oppurtunity like this. So lo and behold i walked in and enjoyed the shiur. A little piece of torah lizecher nishmas - He explains how the word Yavan is made up of three leters - Yud, Vav, Nun and how the Vav represents spirtuality so what yavan does is take the Yud (spirtuality) bring it down to earth (Vuv) and then bury it (Nun) while the jews are just pure Yud which is madu up of the letters - Yud, Vuv, Dalid - So the Jews take the Yud bring it to earth (vav) but then try to spread the knowledge (how the dalid goes out. May we all be zocheh to spread the torah that was lost with the loss of one of the great neshamas of klal Yisroel and may his Neshama have an Aliyah.

PS - me and my friends are going out for lizechar nishmas shwarma

בלי עין הרע

Tonight (1030- 1) I went with my friend to the apple store because he wanted someone to go with him so he can get a new laptop (Batya your laptop is on the floor in my room). I walked in and all the sales people were wearing red shirts. Do you think they are wearing red shirts because they are scared of Yetzar Hara's because their computers are so much better then windows computers. Just some food for thought.

I'm sick

i have strep :( rabbi (black hair) kramer came over to see how i was

Be mekayim the mitzvah of Bikur Cholim

Mike has strep.

a living petri dish?

is it only me or do i dedicate atleast one post a week to informing everyone which one of my children are sick? well everyone has colds. rumbles sounds awful and chavi keeps telling me her ear hurts. awesome. to be fair i was warned that the first year a kids starts school they get sick more. which means that hopefully next year ill be off but then the following year when rumbles starts i get to do this al over again.

walked to geula today.....a preview for this upcoming summer bz"h

Today I walked to geula. A store was have a mivtzah on hooks and my whole house looks like one big coat rack. there are now hooks in back of all my doors. I calculated from my walk today that it will the me 46 minuts and 56 seconds to walk to mommy this summer. (not including my stops for ice kaffe)

My kids are sleeping, need to go and maintain order in my house.

Welcome bubby sue. what a zchus to have you join are blog. maty you be zoche to another 50 years of blogging.

bassie j

New Rule: No making puns, especially with the word Gross in it.

But a quick Pun story. In the dale carnegie course given in shaalvim at the end of choref Zman (the long period of time in between sukkos and Pesach when you do most of your flipping out in israel), one of the "games" we played was we had to think of a clever way to get other people to remember our name. So I (chaim gross) came up with this. Close your eyes and picture a boat of fresh russian (they didnt have deodorant in russia) immigrants pulls up to ellis island. And off walks an extra large (double stuffed) man and his beard had even more food in it then Sruli's after thanksgiving. And there was a booger hanging out of his left nostril that was already starting to get a little crusty (Putting Yosef Schachars crusty nose to shame). He turns to you and says "Chello, Chi am gross looking" and that is how you can remember my name. This is a creative exercise we can use to break out of our shells and also we can use these techniques to help us remember other peoples names. Please comment below with creative ways we can remember your names. (this is one of my better posts)